Disconnect to Connect

Yesterday I spoke in Michigan for the MASC/MAHS Center 9 Regionals. I had a blast with a great group of student leaders (and truly appreciated their assist in a Valentine’s Day message for my girlfriend).

I’ve become accustomed to the start of most leadership conferences. There tends to be some music, a welcome message from the hosts, a video or skit, and some remarks from an advisor. The theme and purpose of the event is always set up and some logistics are covered.

At yesterday’s event, Todd Burlingham, Coordinator of Student Leadership Services (MASC/MAHS), phrased a now common announcement in a manner I really liked. He had to do the standard “turn off your cell phones” message, but he said, “let’s disconnect to connect.”

I loved the phrase. Sadly, it’s quite true. Regardless of the audience, location, or event purpose, I’m always blown away that several attendees are still attached to their cell phones. While many are quite attentive during sessions, they use that valuable free time (in which they could connect with other attendees, build their network, and share insights) to check their facebook or text a boyfriend/girlfriend back home.

I sadly have to be reminded about this too. My good friends Tom & Rachel have implemented a “no cell phone” rule whenever I hang out with them. I’ve realized (especially with their poignant reminders) that through my alone traveling time, I’ve developed an incredible addiction to my facebook, email, and text messages. They fill the time when I travel. Sadly, that sometimes means I take out my iphone when I’m with friends. In doing this, I know I send the nonverbal message that facebook, an email, or a text message is more important than the people with whom I’m currently visiting.

That, of course, is the opposite of what I want to do. But I know that many of us are guilty of it at times.

Sure there are times where we need to make a call back home or send a quick facebook message or email. Since I’m gone so much, I do need to spend some time nourishing relationships while I’m away so that they can still thrive. Still, if the nourishment of those relationships prevent me from truly serving the people I’m with or growing and developing as a person because I’m constantly distracted, than I’m just going through the motions and not reaching my potential.

So I’m going to try to be better about this in 2011. If you see me at a conference, playing on my iPhone for more than just a moment, call me out on it. Ask your friends to do the same for you.

Our connections are incredibly important, but perhaps at times we need to “disconnect to connect.”