What do you ask the man in the mirror?
It’s something I’ve thought about ever since I first heard Michael Jackson’s popular song, Man in the Mirror. The chorus lyrics couldn’t be any clearer:
I‘m Starting With The Man In The Mirror
I’m Asking Him To Change His Ways
And No Message Could Have Been Any Clearer
If You Wanna Make The World A Better Place
Take A Look At Yourself, And Then Make A Change
I thought about these lyrics this week as two news stories regularly appeared in my facebook newsfeed this week. The first is the disgusting account of what a group of students and parents did in Mississippi. The story of Constance McMillen has received a great deal of national press over the past few weeks ever since her school banned her from attending prom with her girlfriend and later cancelled the event. Eventually a new prom was established. McMillen attended with a total of seven students, many accounts highlighting the fact that two of the other students had learning disabilities. Why is this significant? Seven students attended the new prom while over a hundred attended a secret event at an undisclosed location. The deception was deliberate. Facebook posts by classmates state how they didn’t want the drama from McMillen. For some reason, they also chose to “punish” five other students as well. Again, they purposely organized a separate “prom” event and kept it secret from McMillen and the other students at the “official” prom.
I’m not saying that everyone must be invited to every private party. I do believe we have our own group of close friends. However, this was something bigger. This was an attempt to betray someone. It was a party organized with the intent of not inviting someone and parents and students were all involved in the deception. From the facebook posts I’ve seen on the topic from the students at the school, they don’t seem to feel remorse.
What do they tell the man in the mirror?
I was feeling a loss of hope in the manner in which the students handled this situation. Then I read another article about a sixth grader in Arizona who is standing up for the way in which we use language to bully at our school. She realized that students and teachers don’t seem to fret when words like “faggot” or “gay” are used to basically tell someone they are stupid, but that teachers and students would stand up if a race were used in the same way. When her school administration did nothing, she wrote an opinion piece for her local paper. She’s fighting the issue. She’s in sixth grade.
I try to keep this blog non-political. I’m not commenting here on my viewpoints on gay marriage, don’t ask don’t tell, gay adoption, or any of the more controversial issues (although I do have strong opinions on each of these issues). I think this is something more basic that we can all agree upon regardless of our religious or political beliefs.
Treat others the way you would like to be treated.
I strongly believe in our right to disagree and to debate. However, we must continue to show respect for one another.
The actions of the students in Mississippi make me sick to my stomach. What they did seems so cruel–something that belongs in an opening scene in the film, Mean Girls. I’m wondering why anyone didn’t stand up? Where was the person to say, “this seems wrong”? Where were the student leaders and in what direction did they LEAD their classmates? Can they honestly look at themselves in the mirror at night and say that their actions were fair and just? Would they hope that one day someone would treat their own child the way they treated McMillen?
I think it is time they ask the man in the mirror to change his ways.
What do you ask the man in the mirror?
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